Vulnerable
by l0vetakesnoprisoners
Summary: "She's not going to wait forever, you know." Reid/JJ songfic. R&R


**Disclaimer:** I do not own _Criminal Minds_ or "Vulnerable" by Secondhand Serenade, I'm just playing with their toys.

_Tell me, tell me,  
>what makes you think that you are invincible?<br>I can see it in your eyes that you're so sure.  
>Please don't tell me that I'm the only one that's vulnerable.<br>Impossible._

-Secondhand Serenade, "Vulnerable"

Reid smiled as he watched JJ sitting on the blanket spread out on the grass, her golden locks flowing in the breeze. A gentle smile graced her lips as she watched her young son play with Jack Hotchner, a sign that she was finally happy after all the months of hardship, not only within the team, but with her home life and Will.

He shivered as the wind blew again. Why did Garcia force them to have a picnic in the middle of October? Something about everything being finally right or something about the right time…

JJ pulled the blanket that was wrapped around her a little tighter as a few brightly-colored leaves floated by her. He could feel himself grinning like an idiot as he watched her, but he couldn't help himself. JJ was one of the few people in his life that always made him happy, excluding the brief time after Emily's return.

"She's not going to wait forever, you know."

He started at the sound of Emily's voice. "Wha-what are you talking about?" He asked with a slight blush.  
>"Oh, come on, Reid. We both know that you love her. I just don't know what's taking so long for you to tell her."<p>

Spencer was about to lie, but decided against it. "She was really hurt by Will. I can't expect her to just get over it."

"That was a month ago, Reid. She's fine now. Just because you were hurt doesn't mean you shouldn't bleed," Emily replied, folding her arms loosely as he turned back to JJ. "I'm gonna get back to the rest of the team."

He nodded in response, never turning his head away from the one woman he knew he'd always love.

"Just remember, she isn't going to wait forever." With that last bit of advice, Emily walked back to where Rossi, Hotch, Derek, and Penelope were settled by the picnic table, leaving Reid with his thoughts.

He took a deep breath, trying to make his warring mind finally reach a decision, when JJ called him.

"Spence, you okay?"  
>He hesitated and then finally reached a conclusion. "Yeah, just a little cold," he said with a slight shiver.<p>

She opened the blanket, revealing her jeans and Redskins jersey. "Well, come on in," she said, her smile making his heart race, "there's plenty of room."

He smiled in return and made his way over to sit with her. Once they were fully covered with the blanket, she snuggled a bit closer to him, and turned back to Henry and Jack. She was so close that he could smell her coconut scented shampoo. He loved that smell.

"You know," she began, tilting her head to see his face, "autumn is my favorite season."  
>"Why?" he asked.<p>

"It reminds me of my sister. Her favorite holiday was Halloween, she loved being scared, and she loved the cool temperatures, and the leaves… Autumn just makes me feel closer to her."

He paused, not really knowing what to say. She saved him from having to answer when she asked, "What's your favorite season?"

He had to think about it because he hadn't really before. "I think winter is," he answered, his lips pursed in thought.  
>"You think?" she asked, snuggling closer with a teasing smile.<p>

"Well, I hadn't really thought about it before, but I think winter's my favorite because despite the commercialization of Christmas, generally there's close family interaction involved. Come to think of it, winter has a lot of family aspects to it, whether it's staying inside together when there's a snowstorm or spending Christmas morning together. I think that I admire that because it's something I never had."

JJ's jaw dropped in disbelief. "Spencer, I never knew that you spent Christmas alone. I always assumed that you spent it with your mother."

"No," he replied. "I would, but for some reason my mother always has really bad episodes around the holidays. Something about them set her off."

"You should've said something. You could've come to my house."  
>"I figured that it would make Will uncomfortable."<p>

"Spence, I know that Will and I had our issues, but he would have never been rude to you just because you're my friend."

"It wasn't that, JJ," he began, but stopped himself. Was he sure that he wanted to do this? Was he willing to risk it all for feelings that she might not even return?

"Then what was it?"

He looked at Henry, then at her. Her hair was still flowing in the breeze. Her blue eyes were clouded with confusion. He gulped.

"JJ, I—I'm not really sure…" he paused, firmly deciding that he was going to do this. "I love you. I have since the day I met you, and I don't know if you feel the same. I know that Will cheated on you and hurt you, but I want you to know that I'd never do anything like that to you because I love you, and I love Henry so much. I understand if you're unprepared for a new relationship so soon, or if you don't even want one with me."

"Spence," she tried to interrupt, but he pressed on.

"But, I realized that I can't live without you. When we spent those months virtually apart, I couldn't function right because I knew something was missing. Your smile makes my heart race, but it also makes everything clearer. When I see you, I know exactly what I want in my life. I know exactly who I want in my life, you and Henry."

"Spencer," she tried once again, but he kept pouring his heart out, acutely aware of the team watching less than twenty feet away.

"I can be Henry's father-figure; I can be your boyfriend, husband, or anything else that you want. I could even be just your friend, even though it'd kill me. But, I'd do it again because I can't not have you in my life. I love you, JJ. I feel like shouting it from the rooftops, and as unoriginal as it is, I feel like I was born to tell you it."

He finally paused enough for her to get a word in. "You get a B for originality," she said with a smirk.

He looked down at his trembling, sweaty hands, and could barely allow himself to bring his eyes up to meet hers. He was surprised to see that she was so confident and sure.

"I don't know how you're so invincible, JJ. I feel extremely vulnerable, and you seem completely unshaken. I just don't know how you do it."

She took his shaking hand in hers, which he realized, surprisingly, was shaking too.

"I am scared, Spencer. I'm not sure what I want to happen with my life right now, but I can tell you one thing for certain."

"What's that?" he asked.  
>She pulled him closer to her, and gave him a slow, meaningful kiss.<p>

"You won't be spending another Christmas alone."

-[]-

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